Biggy swears that I did not so much give birth to Georgia as that I divided myself in two, split into two versions of myself, each of whom can be called Tangia (pronounced Tonja). This morning we chatted briefly on the phone:
G: Greg's sick too?
T: Yeah, but of course he's sicker than I am. So I have to take care of him.
G: Of course.
T: This morning, he said, "I CAN'T miss work," and I said, "Sure, the WHOLE company is going to crumble if you're out one day. You are THAT important." He couldn't even sit up to take his Nyquil.
G: You know what I hate?
T: Where should I start?
G: No, I mean what I hate right now--what I'm thinking about.
T: You have to take a shower.
G: YES!
T: God, I hate showers. Nobody except you understands the whole getting wet thing.
G: Right?
T: The best part of taking a shower is drying off.
G: Exactly. And the worst thing ever is if I have to dry off immediately and get dressed. I need to sit for at least half an hour in my towel.
T: Because you can't really get dry. No matter how many times I wipe the back of my arms with a towel, they're still wet.
G: And under the boobs.
T: And under my ass cheeks. But yours haven't fallen yet.
G: Something to look forward to.
T: It's not just showers, either. I always think I want to take a long hot bath, and then I get in, and I immediately think, "Ew, it's wet. I need to dry off." I think I have a cat soul.
G: Or a Chihuahua soul.
T: But Fay always wants to get in the tub with me.
G: Until she does get in. Then she wants back out.
T: That's so true! She's just like us.
G: Anyway, I've GOT to go take a shower and get ready for work.
T: Thank god I don't have to take a shower today, because I'm sick.
G: Love you.
T: Love you too. We'll talk later.
8 comments:
what a strange conversation....
anyway,
and just wait till you are too to take a tub bath cause you can't get out of the tub.
How is it possible that I've known you (and GA) all these years and not known about your aversion to showers/baths? I am so glad that it's not stopped you from taking them. How are you & G feeling? Are Lo & Jack sick too?
Kathy, you used to know.
insert -too OLD to first comment
duh, mamoo
I can honestly say I've never heard anyone talk about this before. Or at least admit it. Just recently someone said to me, "Tell me something you've never told anyone." I thought for a bit and said, "OH! Here's one! .....I absolutely LOATHE taking a shower!"
It's so time-consuming and, yes, wet...and my hair is so thick it takes ALL DAY to dry because of course I never have time to blowdry it since I'm always running late since I dreaded the shower and put it off.
To add insult to injury, the rest of my family LOVES to shower and sometimes takes two a day...gah!
I don't say this often, since I'm so used to being a "freak" that I just assume no one does the weird shit I do...
But I'm really glad someone else feels this way!!!
My memory may have been affected by all the long, hot, environmentally unfriendly showers I take. I hope you're feeling better.
I hate having a wife with a blog.
You know... I hate taking showers too. It might be a leftover of growing up in the 3rd world, but I can be in and out in way under 10 minutes.
I also hate baths. I hate the gray color the water turns. I hate how it feels like "People Soup."
There. I feel better. Haha.
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