One Day, Three Conversations with Minus-Five

Morning, Chat 1:

MF: What are you doing?

TR: Leaving Lo's softball game. I'm trying to talk her into riding home with her father.

MF: That should be easy.

TR: No, it's not. She knows he WANTS her to go with him. Hey, you know how last night was Jack's first football-game-marching-band performance?

MF: Um, I think you mentioned that--ABOUT 28 TIMES THIS WEEK.

TR: Well, by the second inning, I was seriously over the game. On top of that, I was getting nauseated from being in the seething cauldron of teenage hormones--sixth and seventh grade girls wearing more makeup than KISS, the high school boys with their Sevenfold haircuts. So as soon as the band finished their half-time show, we left Jack there and went to eat pizza. We did order to-go for him, though.

MF: Poor Jack. But what I wanna talk about is how you guys eat pizza more than any family I know. More than mine did, even.

TR: We're busy. I can't be cooking tacos all the time.

MF: Seriously, though, Tania.

Afternoon, Chat 2:

MF: What are you doing?

TR: Taking Jack to his friend Miki's.

MF: Is Jack running away?

TR: Jack, she wants to know if you're running away.

Jack: Tell her to keep it on the DL.

TR: He's running away, and I'm driving him there. I also helped him pack.

MF: Poor Jack.

Evening, Chat 3:

MF: What are you doing?

TR: Watching Harry Potter with my kid.

MF: Did Biggy go watch the Florida game somewhere?

TR: Yup. But I went to run at the river with Georgia AND I went shopping. I owe him the three hours.

MF: I'm just saying...I knew you were full of crap earlier about how he wasn't going to leave you stuck with Lola all evening.

TR: Whatever. Hey, I've gotta go. Mine and Lo's pizza is here.


minus five said...

a. football is measured in quarters, not innings.

b. do i really say "what are you doing?" at the beginning of every conversation?

c. i've been high all day long.

Tania Rochelle said...

a. tell that to the umpire.

b. no, sometimes you say "this is debbie millman."

c. high on life, you mean.

minus five said...

a. in football, its a referee, not an umpire.

b. only when student workers answer the phone and i'm being transferred.

c. not at all.

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