Lunchtime Conversation

TR: Mom and Granny decided to adopt that dog they were babysitting—the Jack Russell/Chihuahua mix. Would that be a Jackuahua or a Chick---

Biggy: They did not!

TR: Uh huh.

Biggy: (Counting on his fingers) FIVE dogs. That’s crazy.

TR: Well, if you think about it, the two dachshunds, Jake and Lucy, weigh about 20 and 15 pounds. Then for the Chihuahuas—Madonna weighs 3 and Brody, 5; and the new dog, Honey, weighs 10 tops. All those dogs together don’t weigh as much as a Labradoodle, so pound for pound, it’s really the same.

Biggy: No, it's really not. You can’t calculate it that way.

TR: I just did.

Biggy: You’ve got five times the food and five times the piss on the carpets.

TR: Still, relatively speaking, there's no difference. The amount they eat is proportional to their size. The same with the piss and poop.

Biggy: But you’ve got five pee spots on the floor instead of one.

TR: Yeah, and those five little spots are equal to one big dog’s.

Biggy: That’s such bullshit. What about the vet bills? You have five vet bills.

TR: That’s the only good point you’ve made.


Jennifer said...


Spence said...

So who paid for lunch?

ads. said...

A "Chick Russell". Cool.
When dealing in such a small weight class, I don't see what the deal is.....my dogs have TURDS bigger than that. (If I miss a meal...I may miss an ARM!!!)

Tania Rochelle said...

My point exactly, ads.

Tania Rochelle said...

Oh, yeah. I paid for lunch. I get punished for every fivehead joke.

About Me

My photo
Writer, teacher, student, mom.

Fresh Flowers Delivered